In the Name of Ben's

Hello.

I wish I could write tonight, a happy cheery note, but I can't.

This time of the year is always difficult for me. Tomorrow, September 10th is the true anniversary of the beginning of a difficult, but not entirely awful journey, my son and I took together.
The next few days, September 10th, 11th and 12th, mark the seventeenth year anniversary of the diagnosis, surgery and prognosis of Ben's cancer.
Every year I silently remember those days, and also reflect on the wonderful moments Ben and I share today, because of the excellent care he (we) received.

But it is never easy.

This year it is again, especially hard for me. I have just received news about another little boy named Ben, who has been gallantly fighting against his cancer. Ben is not winning. In fact, Ben will die soon. Ben has a twin, who is healthy.

It is always awful to hear of any child who is diagnosed with cancer. It sickens me because I know all too well the thoughts, prayers, hopes and fears one feels during this time. Because this news falls on the anniversary of "my" Ben's cancer, I am taking it especially hard.

At a time in our country when we are fighting about health care, I become perplexed with these questions. How can we NOT justify funding health care? Why do I see so much hate on the faces of those against health care as a public option? Who on earth would intentionally fabricate lies that muddy this difficult discussion? And lastly, and most importantly in my book, why can't we, at least, cut back on funding weapons and war, and put that money towards health care?

I don't understand.

I'm sad. I'm sorry and I'm sick over the imminent loss of a child named Ben.
Donna